Question by honey bee: Why do I have such a bad luck in life? Should I just kill myself?
Everything in my life just goes wrong. For years I have suffered from OCD and anxiety. I kept running the hospital all the time as I was convinced there was something wrong with me when there wasn’t. I just kept getting panic attacks. I started to go out with friends and take drugs, get drunk and sleep with guys instead to try keep my mind away from panicking and going up the hospital but that just made my OCD alot worse. Sleeping with strange guys made me feel dirty and sick and I was constantly scrubbing and washing myself. I felt like I was washing away my sins. Made me feel pure again. I spend hours in the shower every day. I flooded the bathroom many times. Blew the shower up as it overheated and when on fire. I even bleached my own skin. I was having many arguments with my family over the bathroom. They said I was using it way too much. I ended up breaking down and took many overdoses. I was then sectioned in a psychiatric ward for a long while. When I came out I didn’t feel any better and started to resort to my old ways and was even meeting men from the internet and sleeping with them. I then suddenly fell pregnant. My family went well mad when they found out especially my Dad but eventually came round. My baby was like my savour as I stopped everything. I was no longer sleeping with anyone or doing any drugs nothing. Everything stopped. For the first time in my life I felt contented and happy and was looking forward to having my baby but the happiness didn’t happen for long. My physiologist referred the social services onto me and it ended up being the worst year ever for me. I lost her over a year ago. The social services have stole her away from me and no matter what I do I can’t get her back. I was also brutally raped a few weeks after giving birth to my child which left me really shaken and my stitches split from were I gave birth. I been crying myself to sleep every night and haven’t been hardly eating. I want and miss my baby so much. The social services say i’m too mentally and emotionally unstable to have a child and told me I could never be a mother and any child I have in future will get taken from me so I am not allowed to have any children. I cry all the time over losing my baby. All i’m left with is loads of baby stuff that I don’t even no what to do with. I also got all loose sagging skin on my stomach area with stretch marks on from having my child and my boobs are sagging. It looks horrible and have very low self esteem and confidence. I cry every time I see that. I have lost my child and any chance of having any future family and all i’m left with is a sagging tummy and boobs. I cry cry cry over it all. I been to doctors over my tummy but they won’t do anything about it. All they go on about is funding. They spend £100,000 funding to steal my baby away from me when she didn’t even need protecting as she was at no risk of neglect or harm she was being looked after really well and yet they cant afford 5 grand for a tummy tuck complete bullsh!t. Recently I just got a fungus infection in my nail which I got from wearing alot of fake nails. The first time I got an infection in nail and it disgusts me. My computer also broke but I had it fixed and I lost all of my files. I have lost everything. My pictures and all my music files. Since my child was taken from me I don’t go any were anymore. I have no job or college as i’m severely depressed over everything that has happened to me. I don’t hardly sleep or eat and just cry and cry every night. I am convinced people talk about me behind my back. I have no friends anymore. I no longer have a social life. I don’t even see much of my family. I just recently found out they might be cutting my benefits back and I could lose my house. I don’t know if they are. I have to go for medical tomorrow and find out in a few weeks time. My canary birds also just recently died on me. Feel so guilty as should of took it to the vet. I thought it wasn’t well it was sleeping at bottom of cage. I should of took it vet. Everything in my life is just bad. I feel like nothing ever goes right for me. All I see is things getting worse and worse and i’m sinking to a deep dark tunnel. I just feel so low. Why do I have such bad luck in life? Should I just kill myself?

Best answer:

Answer by “Q”
Why do you have such bad luck? Join the club, so do many people. I’ve heard way worse stories than yours & no don’t kill yourself.

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